Valentine's Day (the movie)

Alright. Let me start by saying that I will not be talking about much of the plot of the movie, because I know some people who want to see it who haven't seen it, yet. That being said, there's really not all that much plot to talk about.

Valentine's Day takes place, basically, within 24 hours. Coincidentally, these happen to be the 24 hours of Valentine's Day. And, as you might guess, it's pretty much all about love -- the ins and outs and ups and downs of it.

** Career Goal Sidenote ** One of the main aspects of the movie is the business owned by Ashton Kutcher's character. It's a flower shop and coffee shop that he runs. I've been thinking about that ever since I saw the movie. If you know of one of those up for sale, let me know. ** End Career Goal Sidenote **

As you may have heard, it takes a page (or two) from the Love, Actually playbook as it interweaves a whole bunch of storylines and you find yourself watching the movie putting together the pieces to see how the characters are all going to fit together. No, it doesn't do it as well as Love, Actually (or Crash -- which does it masterfully in the midst of a much more dramatic movie), but it does it well enough.

And, no, none of the characters are going to win Oscars, although watching Shirley MacLaine acting on screen while she is also being projected in the background (in scenes from 1958s Hot Spell), was amazing. And... wow... the chemistry between the characters was palpable in a few of the scenes. Anne Hathaway and Topher Grace - totally believable in their weird situation. Ashton Kutcher and George Lopez as best buddies - I completely got that. And the pairing of Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner as the lovestruck highschoolers - HI-larious. The soundtrack was amazing, too.

But (You knew there was going to be a "but," right?) I had a few issues. Above all:

Pretty much every woman in the movie needed to gain some weight. Shirley MacLaine (in either time period) had onscreen curves. But as much as I liked seeing Jennifer Garner and Anne Hathaway and Julia Roberts, I just kept thinking that they needed to have a few heart-shaped cookies or the guys they were kissing would get cuts from their cheekbones. On the other hand, I really don't know when Ashton Kutcher and Topher Grace put on weight in all the right places (both of whom are in their 30s, so I don't have to feel like a dirty old man). Wow.

So... What did I really think?

Grade: B+. I loved the Garry Marshall touches. The small moments that made the rest of the movie worthwhile. And the end credits were a fun short all by themselves. But I kept hoping for more. I wanted that moment at the end of Love, Actually, where you feel like the world is going to be okay. (Yes. I know that's totally subjective. Did you expect love to be otherwise?)